It's been awhile since the last time that I post something here. I almost forgot that I have a blog because it seems like writing in a book is a more easier than writing in a blog. It is not norm for me to be here, so something must had happened that it brought me here. Well I guess so.
Just a lot of things playing in my mind. I mean these thoughts somehow killing me slowly. It makes me feel I'm worthless. Some said I'm over thinking over everything. But little did they know that I've had enough. I feel so done. Those un-explainable assumptions, those mistakes that are not sorry. Those things happen and I don't know if I can take it anymore.
It hurts, seeing you prioritizing others rather than me. It hurts, seeing you talk happily to others but not to me. It hurts seeing you laugh to other's jokes but keep your straight face when it comes to me. It hurts, thinking I am loved but not sure about it.
It hurts so bad. You have no idea how hurtful it is. No...
Cila
Dear love,
I'm not sure what's going on and I don't know what's in your head right now. Things might not be the way you wanted, or there is something bothering you or there's something that you yourself didn't know what it is. I don't know because you tell me nothing. But I know you will tell me later, and we'll find the solution. We'll figure it out. Okay? I know you miss me, because you told me so. I miss you too. Imagine, we meet everyday. Every-single-day. But since 2nd sem is over, we spent more time for ourselves. Plus, I stayed home and for this 3 days, I wasn't in uia. I was busy doing things and working. I'm sorry.
I really wanna be someone that you'll look for whenever you need to idk maybe talk? cry? or anything? you know it's okay if you wanna cry or curse or etc. Just tell me what you need and I'll try to fulfill it. I've told you before, I'm your girlfriend and I will do anything just to make you feel better.
I love you. So much
Your love,
Kila
I'm not sure what's going on and I don't know what's in your head right now. Things might not be the way you wanted, or there is something bothering you or there's something that you yourself didn't know what it is. I don't know because you tell me nothing. But I know you will tell me later, and we'll find the solution. We'll figure it out. Okay? I know you miss me, because you told me so. I miss you too. Imagine, we meet everyday. Every-single-day. But since 2nd sem is over, we spent more time for ourselves. Plus, I stayed home and for this 3 days, I wasn't in uia. I was busy doing things and working. I'm sorry.
I really wanna be someone that you'll look for whenever you need to idk maybe talk? cry? or anything? you know it's okay if you wanna cry or curse or etc. Just tell me what you need and I'll try to fulfill it. I've told you before, I'm your girlfriend and I will do anything just to make you feel better.
I love you. So much
Your love,
Kila
Depression is real.
it happen. it might happen in any time. though in time you least expect it would hit you. sometimes i just feel wrong for being depress. because it makes me push people away. and for some reason that i don't know why, i hope they would ask me why. why am i being this way. why i'm not okay. but things not working the way i wanted because they don't care. don't lie. because if they did, they would ask.
it happen. it might happen in any time. though in time you least expect it would hit you. sometimes i just feel wrong for being depress. because it makes me push people away. and for some reason that i don't know why, i hope they would ask me why. why am i being this way. why i'm not okay. but things not working the way i wanted because they don't care. don't lie. because if they did, they would ask.
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